sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
