JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
