sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
