he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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