i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Randomize
