I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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