The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
