was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize