I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
