Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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