Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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