I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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