nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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