nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
