Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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