all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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