this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
