Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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