My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
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