would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
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Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
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Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I feel like a drive thru vagina
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
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