it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
