i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Randomize
