Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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