Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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