you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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