WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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