Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize