hell yes lets make some ravioli
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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