I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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