dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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