The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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