Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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