best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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