Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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