There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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