I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
