the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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