no. you can't hotbox the world.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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