Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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