Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I need a hoe opinion
go on
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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