I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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