Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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