What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
