he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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