we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
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