Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
