there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
