As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
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Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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