why didn't you poke me back
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize