Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.

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  (630): Just got done shaving my balls. You were right. http://tfl.nu/e0qo
  Replies (22) Good night (1959) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  She announced her abortion via fbk

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  (864): She announced her abortion via fbk http://tfl.nu/kc9n
  Replies (68) Good night (783) Bad night (6522)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.

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  (770): Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable. http://tfl.nu/w2xg
  Replies (16) Good night (2776) Bad night (1367)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.

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  (651): You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping. http://tfl.nu/k03m
  Replies (12) Good night (871) Bad night (7314)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny

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  (734): TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny http://tfl.nu/rat0
  Replies (24) Good night (1166) Bad night (3497)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was

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  (248): he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was http://tfl.nu/zwm2
  Replies (51) Good night (1213) Bad night (9065)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?

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  (406): One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts? http://tfl.nu/1591
  Replies (14) Good night (1411) Bad night (4219)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.

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  (207): just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries. http://tfl.nu/mz24
  Replies (3) Good night (3864) Bad night (819)
• Favorite

  (348): View more from

  Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...

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  (348): Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment... http://tfl.nu/ldjn
  Replies (5) Good night (2917) Bad night (1070)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia

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  (209): He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia http://tfl.nu/8vrp
  Replies (10) Good night (788) Bad night (2101)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.

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  (617): No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack. http://tfl.nu/ritq
  Replies (6) Good night (1026) Bad night (1247)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.

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  (651): Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker. http://tfl.nu/umuy
  Replies (13) Good night (1433) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.

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  (760): I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite. http://tfl.nu/b3g6
  Replies (1) Good night (1442) Bad night (784)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.

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  (+44): There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though. http://tfl.nu/j5bh
  Replies (2) Good night (312) Bad night (696)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?

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  (224): How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister? http://tfl.nu/hq7k
  Replies (4) Good night (627) Bad night (635)

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