Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed